Three months ago today our babies were born.
They were four months too early.
It all still seems so unreal, so surreal.
The day they were born was definitely the most difficult day of my life.
It was also the most beautiful.
I became a mother.
My husband a father.
There have been a lot of ups and downs since then but with each passing day I have found even more beauty in that day. You don't always recognize compassion, caring and love when you see it the first time in somebody you don't really know. But we were blessed with some of the most caring nurses I have ever met, an understanding doctor and a very young social worker who did her best to walk us through some very difficult decisions. She left us with a booklet to read through, things we might want to consider. Funeral arrangements, announcements, ways to deal with grief, etc.
I remember my first reaction. No way was I going to send out "blank" announcements - I still can't use the term that was in the book, suffice to say it is opposite of what new parents should be sending out.
My babies were BORN that day!
That will always be how I remember and celebrate that day.
As their Birth Day.
Strangely, I wrote the words for the seed packet
the first week we were home.
The card followed shortly after.
We designed a card,
printed, cut and folded it ourselves.
We chose seeds and filled packets.
It's taken awhile to build up the strength to send them.
And we'd like to send one to you.
Your words and thoughts have been shared
and received with love and appreciation.
You have all given us so much support.
If you will drop me a quick line with your mailing address
I would be so happy to put a card and seed packet in the mail for you.
It is a comforting thought to know that Saskia & Arne
might be playing at your house,
in your garden
today ...
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I love you so, Jovita. And I love when you write about Saskia and Arne. Sometimes I feel as if I almost know them...perhaps in spirit, where all things are possible, I already do. I have very tiny places to plant things where I am living now, but if you choose to share with me those seeds of love, I will plant them in the best and most important spot. I think you and Axel are incredibly amazing parents and people. Thanks for sharing your lives with me.
ReplyDelete1003 E Mountain View, eburg 98926
Deb xoxoxo
I, too, had sweet babies born too soon. It has been decades, now, but I still think of them often. Big hugs to you and your husband. I would be honored to have a memory of Saskia and Arne blooming at my house.
ReplyDeleteYvonne Hamilton
16941 126th Pl. SE
Renton WA 98058
<3<3<3
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful way of sharing the memory of Saskia and Arne with all those who care about you. I'm moving to a new house soon and would love to add Saskia's and Arne's garden.
ReplyDeleteLeslie Engelson
1705 Holiday Dr.
Murray, KY 42071
The loss of your babies is a great burden to bear, may your strength sustain you, their memory will remain in your hearts forever. May peace come with each day that passes. Your gift of seeds for beautiful flowers for Sakia & Arne is a wonderful way for all to remember and to cherish each moment to its fullest!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing and your unselfish giving to others in your time of loss! Our thoughts & prayers are with you.
Jewell Thompson
PO Box 693
Wenatchee, WA 98807
yes, yes, yes, I have some new bare spots that are waiting for the footprints of Arne and Sakia. I have been rearranging and moving my plants in the gardens and stood back to say I wonder what I can put there? once again there is reason for their "birth" and rejoycing in your love for them. You have my address kiddo's send away!
ReplyDeleteIndead , what a wonderful way of sharing the memory of Saskia and Arne with all those who care about you. I'll would love to add Saskia's and Arne's garden. You have my adress. I would be honored to have them in my garden
ReplyDeleteMagda
what a wonderful remembrance. I have a lovely, messy garden - just the place for a couple of kids. thinking of you and Axel.
ReplyDeleteAnne Gillihan
18534 28th Ave NE
Lake Forest Park, WA 98155
I would love to have your seeds growing in my garden....I won't be planting them until the fall when the weather starts to get cooler here in Az. This is such a lovely idea. Thanks so much for letting us all be a part of your childrens garden!
ReplyDeleteLeslie Budd
1641 E Broadmor Dr
Tempe, Az. 85282
USA
what a beautiful way to remember your babies, jovita. i love to read your writing and i'm glad that it's been giving you some measure of comfort through this passage of time.
ReplyDeleteSteph S.
Hi Jovita, it's John Stewart's sister, Beth. John's kept me up to date on your doings over the years, so I was very sad to read about the loss of your beautiful babies. John has a community garden plot across the street from his house; if you haven't already you should send him a seed packet, I'll make sure he follows through on the planting. I'll say a special prayer for you and your husband for comfort for you both. I've enjoyed looking over your blogs and that grapefruit cake sounds AMAZING. I think it'll be my next Sunday school offering--cake for breakfast is delightful. Take care, Beth. elizabethn@abclegal.com.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much for the seeds Jovita and Axel.
ReplyDeleteI gave them a nice place in my garden and I hope I could send you some photographs this year.
Chris